Today’s Mandala Message: Time to Tell the Truth
This week I’m working through Principles #50 and #51 from Jack Canfield’s “The Success Principles” entitled “Tell the Truth Faster” and “Speak with Impeccability”. I set my intention today to ponder the idea of telling the truth about how I feel sooner rather than later. Canfield states: “Learning to speak your truth sooner is one of the most important success habits you will ever develop. … Will it be uncomfortable? Probably. Will it create lots of reactions? Yes. But it is the right thing to do. Get into the habit of telling the truth faster. … Hiding the truth always backfires. The longer you withhold it, the more disservice you do to yourself and to the others involved.”
I think for me I hold back telling the truth because I’m afraid to hurt someone’s feelings and/or fear the potential backlash. Intellectually, I know that I’m not responsible for how people feel; yet there are measures I can take to share with kindness and compassion…which means making sure I take a more thoughtful approach.
Dennis Reina of ReinaTrustBuilding.com shares 7 ways to tell a difficult truth:
- Set your intentions. “what do you want for an outcome?”
- Differentiate between ‘the’ truth and ‘your’ truth. “Remember, the truth you tell is your truth – the truth based on your perception.”
- Acknowledge possible sensitivity. “Offer up that what you have to say may be difficult for the other person to hear.”
- State your perception of the facts. “Be explicit that you’re offering your interpretation of the facts – the facts as you experienced them.”
- Open the door to feedback. ‘You could say, “This is my take on the situation. What’s yours?” or, “This is how I see things. How do you see them?”’
- Understand the bigger picture. ‘You may consider saying something like, “This is the information I have. Have I missed something? Is there context I don’t have?”’
- Engage in honorable closure. “Closing a truth telling conversation appropriately is as vital as opening it appropriately. Take turns sharing: 1) Something I appreciated… 2) Something I learned… , 3) One thing I’m going to work on or do differently…”
I can see where this approach would be helpful. While it doesn’t guarantee that it will go smoothly, it offers a way to move through it a little more thoughtfully.
A good mindfulness practice would be to contemplate your approach to telling your truth sooner rather than later.
So how about you? Are you holding back the truth about how you feel or what you think? How does it feel to hold it back? How does it affect your life and your relationship with others?
“I don’t want any yes-men around me.
— Samuel Goldwyn
I want everybody to tell me the truth
even if it costs them their jobs.”
Blessings,
Maureen
The Mandala Lady
All Things Mandalas
An Invitation
I invite you to color along with me this year as part of what I’m calling “The Year of Self-Exploration and Expansion” with all of my “Mandalas of the ___” (day, week, month, year). If you’re interested in more of a self-exploration approach to coloring, check out my “Coloring Mandalas as Meditation”. You can download this mandala at MandalaoftheWeek.com.
Mandala of the Day 