Today’s Mandala Message: See the Big Picture
This week I’m working through Principle #52 “When In Doubt, Check It Out”. I set my intention today to ponder seeing the bigger picture to determine what’s really going on. Continuing with the article I referenced yesterday by Catherine Winter on AConsciousRethink.com about assumptions, she offers 8 ways to help us stop making assumptions. Today I’m addressing number 7: “See the big picture to understand someone’s motivations.” She states: “Many of us have knee-jerk responses to things that people say or do because of our own history, so it’s important to be able to see where people’s behaviors are coming from. This can be difficult to do, especially if you’ve been through harrowing circumstances in the past.”
She further states: “When and if you find yourself in a situation like this, pause and consider what’s going on around you before allowing yourself to react emotionally. Take stock of where you are and whom you’re with. Then remember what your relationship is like with this person, as well as who they are as an individual. Ask yourself whether this person has treated you poorly in the past or if you’re reacting to someone else’s behavior. Then determine what is influencing the current situation.”
When I was in college, one of my professors told our class that we could call the admin’s office on a certain day to find out our grade in advance. Per instructions, I called the office. The woman who answered said that she was not allowed to give out grades over the phone. For a normal, healthy person, the call probably would have ended right there. I, instead, mildly argued with her at first, telling her “but our professor said you would”. She stayed neutral and continued to tell me that she couldn’t give out the grades. Meanwhile, I’m getting more and more upset, continuing to argue with her, practically in tears…actually I was in tears by the time I hung up…actually not tears, I was sobbing!
Thankfully having had therapy in the past, my brilliant observer mind, in the midsts of my wailing, kindly let me know that my reaction to that call FAR EXCEEDED what it actually called for. The woman was just doing her job and I basically attacked her. In that moment I realized that something big from my past was being triggered and that I needed help. The following week I was back in therapy.
A good mindfulness practice would be to pause when you feel yourself triggered…ask yourself “what’s really going on here?”.
So how about you? Do you have knee-jerk reactions to what someone innocently says or does? Does your reaction seem blown out of proportion, does it seem unwarranted? Or are you able to pause long enough to understand what’s really going on before responding?
“Survey and test a prospective action
— Epictetus
before undertaking it.
Before you proceed,
step back and look at the big picture,
lest you act rashly on raw impulse.”
Blessings,
Maureen
The Mandala Lady
All Things Mandalas
An Invitation
I invite you to color along with me this year as part of what I’m calling “The Year of Self-Exploration and Expansion” with all of my “Mandalas of the ___” (day, week, month, year). If you’re interested in more of a self-exploration approach to coloring, check out my “Coloring Mandalas as Meditation”. You can download this mandala at MandalaoftheWeek.com.
Mandala of the Day 