Self-Sufficiency
“able to maintain oneself without aid”
I learned at an early age to be as self-sufficient as I can. Being the oldest of four children in my family, I had to take on more mature roles early on in order to help take care of my brothers and with the household chores.
By 12-13, I was a built-in babysitter for all four of us. I recall a distant memory of my parents telling me that I was responsible for them…I took it to heart and continued that feeling of responsibility through my adult (and current) years.
I also learned that I needed to be vigilantly aware of everything going on in our home so I could predetermine what needed to be done to avoid any cause for blow-ups. My first memory of this happened one Thanksgiving when I was about 8 or 9. I could see that mother was working hard with prepping the meal and getting the house ready for company. I wanted to help. So I asked her what I could do to help out? She angrily replied “If you don’t know what needs to be done, then I can’t help you.” Ouch. That’s when I realized I needed to develop my mind-reading skills.
I had similar experiences with my father when asking him for help or telling him what I wanted. Granted I got a little off topic but I needed to give some backstory for my need to be self-sufficient. Asking for help was mostly emotionally and mentally painful.
So I’m grateful that I learned how to be self-sufficient; it has helped me a great deal over the years…both in my personal and professional life. The downside, however, I struggle with asking people for help…especially from people who I know want to help me. My fear is: I don’t want to be a bother and I don’t want people to think I can’t figure out things for myself. I’m working on swinging the pendulum back towards a healthy center…equally balanced with asking for help and being self-sufficient.
How about you? Is self-sufficiency a core value for you?
joyfully,
Maureen
The Mandala Lady
inspiring and encouraging creativity, curiosity, and play through the art of mandalas
About the 2024 Mandalas of the Day
Each day I will create and post a mandala inspired by one of 366 “value” words chosen randomly. The objective being to discover for myself which ones would best represent my core values…and by doing so, I hope it inspires you to determine your own.
Mandala of the Day 