Neutrality
“absence of decided views, expression, or strong feeling”
I first became aware of the idea of personal neutrality from a section of the book “A Course in Miracles”. The line states:
Perhaps it will be helpful to remember that no one can be angry at a fact. ²It is always an interpretation that gives rise to negative emotions, regardless of their seeming justification by what appears as facts. ³Regardless, too, of the intensity of the anger that is aroused. ⁴It may be merely slight irritation, perhaps too mild to be even clearly recognized. ⁵Or it may also take the form of intense rage, accompanied by thoughts of violence, fantasied or apparently acted out. ⁶It does not matter. ⁷All of these reactions are the same. ⁸They obscure the truth (ACIM, M-17.4:1-8)
A Course in Miracles, from the Teacher’s Manual
Essentially it’s saying that a fact can not make us angry…it just is…it’s our reaction to that fact that we choose to be angry…which is mostly an unconscious choice. A perfect example is this video where the mother reveals to her kids the gender of the baby she’s having. Her stating the gender is a fact. The kids however react completely different to the news…the fact didn’t cause their reactions…they (consciously or not) chose to react as they did.
When faced with a fact we tend leap over a vial step and jump immediately into a reaction. We forget that we can consciously choose how we want to respond to it versus just reacting to it. We forget we have options. By going into neutral (observer) mode, we can more clearly assess the situation and determine how best to respond.
Where I fail with this is when I’m in a restaurant or flying and a family with one or more littles is situated nearby. I immediately go into reaction mode…”oh no…small children”…Before you all react to this thinking I “hate” children…let me explain. I wear hearing aids and as great as the technology is, they tend to not adjust properly to screaming, squealing, or any other high-pitched noises…the sounds usually get amplified in my head…and it’s painful. BTW…I have the same reaction to whistling.
It’s challenging for me to be neutral in these situation because I fear the potential pain. However, if I chose to be neutral about it, I could calm myself and adjust the directional on my hearing aids app so as to maintain my peace. If for some reason the noise becomes unbearable, I could calmly ask to be seated elsewhere. Now in a flight situation, I could make sure I come prepared with noise cancellation headphones that play soothing brown noise.
The bottom line, especially from “ACIM”, is to maintain our peace. When I react to something, I lose my peace. When I respond (take responsibility) from a neutral place, I keep my peace.
How about you? Is neutrality a core value for you?
BTW…here’s what it looked like before…
joyfully,
Maureen
The Mandala Lady
inspiring and encouraging creativity, curiosity, and play through the art of mandalas
About the 2024 Mandalas of the Day
Each day I will create and post a mandala inspired by one of 366 “value” words chosen randomly. The objective being to discover for myself which ones would best represent my core values…and by doing so, I hope it inspires you to determine your own.
Mandala of the Day 