22-291 Lovable

Today’s Mandala

“Self-esteem is made up
primarily of two things:
feeling lovable and feeling capable.”

— Jack Canfield

“Don’t walk through the world
looking for evidence
that you don’t belong,
because you’ll always find it. 
Don’t walk through the world
looking for evidence
that you’re not enough,
because you’ll always find it.
Our worth and our belonging
are not negotiated with other people.
We carry those inside of our hearts.”  

— Brené Brown

“When you do the work
to like and love yourself,
it becomes irrelevant
whether anybody else does.
That’s freedom.”

— Megan Forrest

Today’s MotD reminds us that each and every one of us is inherently lovable. Where this becomes most challenging is believing it about ourselves. If this resonates with you, Megan Forrest’s article entitled “When you want to believe you’re lovable but you just don’t” is well worth the read.

Here’s an excerpt that offers a key mindset shift:

“The key is understanding that even though you don’t yet believe you’re lovable, doesn’t mean it’s the truth that you are unlovable! The only reason you don’t believe it yet, is because you’ve had years and years of practice, thinking the thought that you’re unlovable, over and over again.”

She continues…

“thinking and repeating the thought that we’re lovable and worthy must come first. Then, and only then, will the feeling follow.  Our thoughts create our feelings.  And I was never going to feel it, unless I intentionally and deliberately changed my thinking first….

“Our old patterns of thought are automatic and deeply ingrained, and in the beginning it can feel overwhelming when we’re trying to establish new thoughts and beliefs that will ultimately serve us better.

“These new beliefs won’t feel true at first.  So, what we want to begin telling ourselves is, “SO WHAT!! So what if I don’t believe it yet. It doesn’t mean it’s not true and it doesn’t mean I won’t get there.”

“Your job is to practice believing it anyways!! To compassionately remind yourself, “Of course it doesn’t feel true yet, it’s a new thought I’m learning to think!!” 

Our takeaway from this is that “believing” we’re not lovable is just a belief we took on way back when based on incomplete evidence that no one around us (especially ourselves) thought or knew how to correct for us. There’s an excellent chance that where it came from was from others who also took on the “unlovable” belief about themselves. So now it becomes our mission to replace these beliefs with new ones such as “I am lovable”, “I am worthy”, “I am enough”, etc.

“Don’t fake it till you make it.
Fake it till you become it.”

— Amy Cuddy


The Mandala Lady

btw…started with this:


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